I get so proud of Eedy when he comes home these days. My weekly report from his care home show opposition, rebellion and down right bloody mindedness, but when he’s home we get a totally different person. Don’t get me wrong, he’s not unhappy where he lives (as far as I know), he sometimes chooses not to come home. Which actually helps me to feel he is okay where he lives.
This week we were informed of a safeguarding alert from the home relating to another resident, caused by Eedy – think of the most offensive words and insults you could throw and you wouldn’t be far wrong. But I’ve never heard Eedy swear. He’s never dropped the ‘C’ bomb to me, or even f-ed or jeff-ed. But I don’t doubt that he does!
Tonight at 8.40 he told me I was late with his tablets – those tablets that aren’t locked away, they are left on the kitchen side. I potted them up and told him what each is for. I then potted up his 10pm tablet and told him it’s ready for him to go get it when it’s time (‘cos he’s far more likely to remember it than me).
A little while later one of the dogs started getting restless. Hubby and I were sat in recliner seats, Eedy was stood rocking from side to side (as is the norm for him). Hubby looked up:
Hubby: Eedy – let the dogs out will you?
A little while later –
Chrissie: Eedy – let the dogs back in
All so normal – yet worlds apart from the ‘normal’ of the care home. We’ve just had a conversation about shopping tomorrow – Eedy has the choice of coming with us or stopping home alone. There is no risk (and no risk assessment). He’ll be cool. He’s 25 years of age and can use a phone if he needs to.
But in Social Care world he’s never left alone. His tablets are never left out and every prompt is translated by him as a nag. Before coming home he hadn’t washed for over 3 weeks. The area manager asked him if he bathed here. He replied ‘Chrissie wouldn’t let me come downstairs if I didn’t wash’ – not true, but happy he respects my standards! When I raised it on the way home he said ‘you can’t make me’ I replied that I neither couldn’t nor wouldn’t but, we are family so why would we engage in such fights? He didn’t have an answer. And he’ll shower tomorrow morning before I see him. Without doubt.